New Day, New Behavior

As I mentioned in my previous post, Cole is definitely becoming Mr. Independent.  He has his own opinions of how our day should go, what he should eat, what he should wear, what we should play, etc. . . a totally new season of life for us!  

Most days, he very compliant and obeys without warnings or reprimand (our toddler/preschooler years were such a breeze!), but last week we hit a wall.  Every answer was 'no' - just for the sake of arguing, and nothing seemed to satisfy.  I had a minor breakdown - you know the I'm-a-horrible-mom kind (thanks to my raging hormones for making it worse), and then (after rebuking Satan and gathering my thoughts)  put my mind to finding a tangible way to steer my sweet boy's heart away from it's sinful nature to embracing God's way and Word.

Here's my simple, yet highly effective for our house, chart that Cole and I created together with things found around our home. . .

(we added snowflakes for winter, but will easily change them to other die-cuts when seasons/holidays change)

We looked up the Scriptures together and he's even memorized the first two.  The last one he knows from our 'Shout the Word' kids CD.

These are great reminders throughout the day and keep my tone calm instead of saying, "No Cole . . .Stop talking that way. . . talk nice. . . use kind words. . . etc."  When misbehavior arises (usually in the form of his mouth), we go back to these Scriptures and talk about whether or not he's obeying what they say.  Watching the Lord work on his little heart through our conversations has been wonderful to behold!

When Cole obeys without arguing and uses kind words, he gets a sticker in a square.  When a row is completed, he gets to pick a small prize out of our homemade Treasure Box (a piece of candy, stamp, sticker, etc.).  After he completes the entire chart, we'll have a celebration I'm sure with a dinner out of his choice and perhaps a treat.

I'm not one for lots of rewards, but I DO love positive reinforcement instead of always disciplining the negative (which don't get me wrong - is still very necessary and Biblical to course-correct these little lives!).  Cole also responds well to praise and adoration - I believe it may be his Love Language.

We also have a Melissa and Doug responsibility chart which was great when learning small chores and potty training.  For Cole, the reward of simply picking a fun picture magnet to put in the rectangle was enough for him :)  We still use this to encourage making the bed, taking care of Tank, brushing teeth, etc.  To incorporate this with the new chart, we've decided that once he completes a row of magnets, he gets to add a sticker to the other.  He loves it and it's not too much for me to keep up with (I've found the simpler, the better AND the more apt I am to implement it. . .)

 Even though I know there will be ups and downs, I treasure parenting Cole and am so thankful for the gift of his life and the joy he brings to ours!